The most powerful word in any apology isn’t “sorry”. It’s “I” as in “I take responsibility for this mess.”
~ So says author Kyle Westaway.
Here’s a five-step process for getting more than self-gratification from the next time you say “sorry” to someone:Â
1: Regret – feeling genuine remorse is the first sign your apology means anything at all
2: Rationale – explain why you did what you did, and how you now realise your thinking was flawed
3: Responsibility – take it on your shoulders. You did it – it was nobody else’s fault
4: Repentance – make it clear you’ve reviewed your actions and are committed to never repeating them
5: Repair – propose precisely what you’re going to do to make things better again
As Westaway says,
“Most people get stuck on drive-by sorries that repair nothing.”
The best apology is always changed behavior, so clear and powerful that the person you wronged replaces their memory of your previous behaviour with a completely fresh vision of you as a trustworthy, dependable and useful acquaintance.
Love you lots
Jonny
PS: One thing you’ll never have to apologise for is changing lives by the hundred or thousand through corporate wellbeing consulting.Â
To find out how to get started in this highly lucrative field – without changing who you are or how you work – type “Wellbeing” and I’ll send you a full guidebook on how to get into it.